How to avoid a disaster

Have you ever had a special night out spoiled by poor service, poor staff? Lets go Out on a Limb once more and investigate how to avoid such a disaster in the future, plus details of a major new research review from the National Cancer Institute in the USA that recommends meditation for women with breast cancer, and news of the next Happiness and its Causes Conference (that will feature HH the Dalai Lama!) with a special offer to you the reader of a big discount, but first





               Thought for the day

  We can never obtain peace in the outer world 
  Until we make peace with ourselves


                     HH The Dalai Lama 








Imagine this. You have a special occasion to celebrate. Maybe a special birthday, an anniversary. Completion of a challenging piece of work, a loan paid off, a sporting triumph….  All sorts of possibilities, but definitely time for a big celebration.

So you gather the family, maybe some friends; and decide it will be your shout, no expenses spared, and you book into a fancy restaurant.

The evening arrives. Some anticipation. You head into the restaurant, the manager’s greeting is a touch cool, but then this is a classy place, maybe that is how things are done here?

But then the waitress. Definitely cool. Even remote. Hardly much of a welcome at all.

She tells you of the specials for the evening. Almost disinterest. No verve, no enthusiasm. You start to wonder??? This is not how it I imagined it would be. Fancy restaurant. I expected better service than this. The place must have a management problem. They should be employing better staff than this. Or supervising them better; making sure they are doing their job.




You order.



Everyone else seems happy enough.



Maybe it is OK after all.





But your soup arrives and THAT waitress manages to actually spill a little on your lap! Spilled the soup. Good grief! Everyone apologizes profusely, but your worst fears are confirmed. The night is gone for you.

Things go from bad to worse. An error in the mains that arrive, very expensive wine tastes ordinary, dessert not what you hoped for. Big bill. No tip. You try to put on a brave face for your guests, but you leave feeling miserable, swearing you will never go back to that place again.

An unmitigated disaster.

Now, imagine re-running the same scenario - up until the time you arrive at the restaurant. This time, the manager greets you, welcomes you with some reserve and what seems like a little trepidation, then explains.

It seems one of his waitresses had her own disaster just 6 weeks ago. Her husband was killed in a car accident and she has 3 young children to support. She need to work. This is actually her first night back. Everyone is unsure of how she will go, but he asks for your patience and understanding.

So knowing this, how differently things unfold. You welcome her warmly, understand the lack of verve. Laugh off the spilled soup, make good everything else that could have gone “wrong”. The wine tastes sweet; the dessert spectacular. You have a great night. Maybe even make a new friend.

So how much of an explanation in day-to-day events do we need to display compassionate awareness? How often do we stumble into mindless intolerance?

It would seem that compassionate awareness is a big part of Emotional Intelligence, and requires quite some work on our part to over-ride what is often an immediate, unaware, instinctual reaction.

Next time you are at a restaurant, maybe pause for a moment to wonder what sort of day those who are serving you have had.

And smile.

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NEWS
1. Meditation recommended for women with breast cancer
A major new review article has recommended the use of meditation and some other complementary and/or integrative therapies for a range of conditions affecting women with breast cancer. This is such an important piece hat the entire abstract is offered here. The full article can be read by following the link below.

Abstract

Background The majority of breast cancer patients use complementary and/or integrative therapies during and beyond cancer treatment to manage symptoms, prevent toxicities, and improve quality of life. Practice guidelines are needed to inform clinicians and patients about safe and effective therapies.

Methods Following the Institute of Medicine’s guideline development process, a systematic review identified randomized controlled trials testing the use of integrative therapies for supportive care in patients receiving breast cancer treatment. Trials were included if the majority of participants had breast cancer and/or breast cancer patient results were reported separately, and outcomes were clinically relevant. Recommendations were organized by outcome and graded based upon a modified version of the US Preventive Services Task Force grading system.

Results The search (January 1, 1990–December 31, 2013) identified 4900 articles, of which 203 were eligible for analysis. Meditation, yoga, and relaxation with imagery are recommended for routine use for common conditions, including anxiety and mood disorders (Grade A). Stress management, yoga, massage, music therapy, energy conservation, and meditation are recommended for stress reduction, anxiety, depression, fatigue, and quality of life (Grade B). Many interventions (n = 32) had weaker evidence of benefit (Grade C). Some interventions (n = 7) were deemed unlikely to provide any benefit (Grade D). Notably, only one intervention, acetyl-l-carnitine for the prevention of taxane-induced neuropathy, was identified as likely harmful (Grade H) as it was found to increase neuropathy. The majority of intervention/modality combinations (n = 138) did not have sufficient evidence to form specific recommendations (Grade I).

Conclusions Specific integrative therapies can be recommended as evidence-based supportive care options during breast cancer treatment. Most integrative therapies require further investigation via well-designed controlled trials with meaningful outcomes.

REFERENCE: Clinical Practice Guidelines on the Use of Integrative Therapies as Supportive Care in Patients Treated for Breast Cancer. Greenlee H et al; J Natl Cancer Inst Monogr 2014 (50): 346-358.   LINK HERE

2. Happiness and its Causes 2015 with HH the Dalai Lama

Special discount to readers of Out on a Limb

REGISTER HERE 

Ian Gawler Blog: Finding our true identity.

Most people seem pretty busy these days. So much “stuff” to do. So many people to take account of. Work, health, money, kids. Days hurry by. It can be easy to feel a bit lost amidst all the external activity.

So this week, a lyrical tale from out of Africa that offers a practical solution. Plus news from Mackay - I have accepted an invitation to speak there as Ruth and I trek further North. And yes, good news, the weather is getting warmer and the sun is shining as we head for Toowoomba after a full few days in Brisbane. The house-sitter reports 14 degrees and raining in the Yarra Valley. Oh well, the trees will be very happy! But first,

     
Thought for the day

This withdrawal from the day's turmoil 
into creative silence, 
is not a luxury, a fad, or a futility. 

It is a necessity

Because it tries to provide the conditions 
wherein we are able to yield ourselves 
to intuitive leadings, promptings, warnings, teachings, and counsels, 
and also to the inspiring peace of the soul. 
                              
                                   Paul Brunton
  





Consider this. When is a baby first conceived?

Imagine this. A woman decides she will have a child. Conception? She takes herself off and sits under a tree, listening for the song of the child that she will conceive. Once she hears it, she goes to the potential father and teaches him the song. Then they make love, pausing along the way to sing the song together. The couple sing the song to invite the child to join them.

The woman is in Africa, a member of the Himba tribe and this is how they do it.

Once the woman is pregnant, she teaches the child’s song to the midwives, the older women and other members of the village.

The child is born to the welcoming sound of its own song being gently sung by all those around about. As it grows, if it should be injured, face a transition like puberty or marriage, or do something wonderful; the child receives the support, the acknowledgement, the honouring of the people it knows through the agency of them singing its song.

Similarly, if at any stage in its life this person should do something inappropriate – a crime or something socially unacceptable – the villagers gather, form a circle, install the person in the centre and sing them their song.

Correction through love. And affirmation of identity. And a reminder of connection and the truth of
belonging. Gentle correction. Loving correction.

So the song is sung throughout life, and finally at the time of dying.


Different cultures have different traditions, but maybe something resonates when we read of such an extra-ordinary tradition as this. Maybe some yearning or nostalgia swells. A recognition of the value of connecting to the heart and how we need to be on guard to maintain this connection in a busy, largely secular world.

But then maybe too, it is as simple as taking ourselves off on our own from time to time and sitting silently. Maybe listening for our own song, or having it sung to us, is just one way of being reminded of our true identity and what is in our heart’s essence?




Maybe in the still, quiet centre of meditation
we can hear our own voice speak;
maybe even sing to us.


We could listen for that.


It will be easy to know when we hear it.


We will feel in tune with our life.





With thanks to The Mind Unleashed where I first read of this wonderful story.

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NOTICEBOARD

KNOW ANYONE IN MACKAY???

Health, Healing and the Mind comes to Mackay

I have been invited for the first time to speak in Mackay, so if you do happen to know anyone in that area, please do let them know. If you do happen to live nearby - come and say hello!!!

Date:          Friday 1st August 2014
Time:          6.30-9.30pm (arrive at 6 for a 6.30 start)
Venue:       Whitsunday Anglican School Pansy Wood Centre
                     2-12 Celeber Drive, North Mackay
Cost:           $28 pre-purchased online CLICK HERE       
                        or $35 at the door. Healthy light supper included
Enquiries: Sandra or Colin 0431 091 868 
                       or Email: iangawlerinmackay@hotmail.com

Positive thinking – converting a good idea into reality

Positive thinking is very different to wishful thinking. Wishful thinking is where you hope for the best and do nothing about it. Positive thinking is where you hope for the best and do a lot about it! It usually takes commitment, determination, perseverance, resilience – a fair degree of focused attention and hard work.

I am speaking in Pt Stephens, Liz Schiemer’s hometown, on Saturday July 12th as Ruth and I continue our tour up the East Coast. Liz is deeply concerned about the health of her community. High levels of cancer, heart disease, mental illness, even suicide.

However, Liz is a genuine positive thinker. Not one to sit back just simply worrying, what Liz has accomplished is truly inspiring. So this week, as a model of what positive thinking can look like in reality, we share some of the initiatives Liz has taken that are making a significant difference in many lives, but first

Thought for the day

Mental health is 
       “a state of well-being 
       in which every individual realises his or her potential, 
       can cope with the normal stresses of life, 
       can work productively and fruitfully, 
       and is able to make a contribution to her or his community”
                            
                                           The World Health Organisation


During the road trip Ruth and I are on we will be hosted by quite a number of remarkable “positive thinkers” – people who have had the wish to make a difference to the health of their community and then dedicated their lives to that end.

Could have chosen any number to highlight, but for some reason here is Liz’s story.

Liz Schiemer retired from her nursing career to focus on a more natural approach to health and wellbeing. She studied hypnosis, NLP, Life Coaching and meditation – which is how we came to meet.

But not content “just” to develop her own new style of practice, Liz has become actively involved with the Port Stephens Complementary Health Services Association Inc. and the PS Suicide Prevention Network of which she is secretary.

At her clinic, Liz sees people privately and brings to this her professional experience with addictions, epilepsy, disability and a wide range of health issues from stress management to major illness and wellness. Liz also leads a regular meditation group that starts with Qigong, and she hosts regular meetings for Women with Cancer.

The Port Stephens Complementary Health Services Association is an Association of leading healthcare practitioners with a common vision for the ongoing education, nurture and wellbeing of their society. The group is drawn together by their dedication to the promotion of natural healing, and to enabling their community to better manage and enhance their physical, mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing.

To achieve this they work on a shoe string budget with volunteers and any money they make goes back into promotions. You might like to check out their website, CLICK HERE or like their Facebook page CLICK HERE

The PS Suicide Prevention Network (you may want to Like this page too, CLICK HERE) has its main focus on public education. But Liz is also secretary of her local parks and reserves committee that is sponsored by  Council. That group are working with PS Suicide Prevention to establish a dedicated memorial park at Boat Harbour. Several local groups, including youth groups, are working together on that project which it is hoped will be opened during International Suicide Prevention week in September.

So I guess the trick with some of these exceptional “Positive Thinkers” is not to be overwhelmed or intimidated by what they do! Just writing this I marvel at how much Liz does accomplish and want to celebrate it.

However, knowing Liz I have to say how modestly and easily she carries all this. She has a natural enthusiasm – perhaps obviously! – but a natural ease as well. Things just seem to get done with a minimum of fuss and with the people involved having a good time; happy to be a part of it all.

Maybe Liz is just lucky. Maybe it is the meditation. Maybe it is the commitment to service – and the associated commitment to her own good health that is the essential ingredient in providing an ongoing service on such a scale.

Whatever it is, I know it has not been easy for Liz. There have been plenty of ups and downs like there are for most of us. What I delight in with Liz is her commitment to do all she can for the betterment of her community – and the fact that in reality she does it. A true positive thinker. More power to you Liz .

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NOTICEBOARD

1. THE EAST COAST TOUR 
HEALTH, HEALING and the MIND 

Our first talks in Sydney and Katoomba were well attended. Lovely to meet a man who attended the 10day cancer residential program with Ruth and myself 15 years ago due to stage 4 melanoma; yet there he was cancer free and very well. Delightful!

Saturday July 12th is the next day workshop in Pt Stephens before we continue up to Coff’s harbor Tuesday the 15th and Brisbane for 4 days of events starting Thursday 17th. Then right on up to Cairns with a few talks along the way, across to Mt Isa and Alice Springs, and down to Adelaide. A road trip with a difference.

Know someone who might benefit from attending? See you there?

For full details, CLICK HERE

Hope to see many of you along the way. There will be the chance for a refresher, to help get back on track if needed; but also exciting new information and the opportunity to meditate together and to deepen the experience of what meditation really is.

A good opportunity to share what we do with family, friends and colleagues.

FULL DETAILS – CLICK HERE  and please do share the link.


2. Meditation in the Desert : August 29 – September 7 

Still a few spaces available, so come, join Ruth and myself along with like-minded people for 7 days of meditation in the extraordinary atmosphere of the Central Australian desert, followed by several days of close contact with senior local indigenous leaders.

Secure your place with a deposit. For details CLICK HERE




The Christmas Miracle

Firstly, do you know I have a new Facebook page? I am having fun posting more regularly on this new public site, so if you would like to follow me on Facebook, please go to www.facebook.com/driangawler and “Like me”. Seems a bit weird to be asking people to “Like me”, but that is the way it works!!!

Now for the miracle. As a special Christmas treat, this is an almost unbelievable true story that occurred on our farm several years ago. But first

Thought for the Day
The words always, never, everybody & nobody 
are lies
                                  Tracey Bartram

The miracle
For many years I have always had a live Christmas tree. When my children were growing up, we had a new one each year and then planted it out. So on our old farm there developed the Christmas tree avenue, made up of all the different pine trees, cedars and like minded trees.

In more recent times, we have grown the Christmas tree on in a pot until it really is large enough to demand planting. So where Ruth and I live currently, there is only one ex-Christmas tree in the ground, one in a pot.

A couple of years ago our oldest grandchild was with us on the current farm for Christmas and getting to the age of questioning Santa. Fancy that! Anyway, it was a hot year and a good deal of tree watering was required. Having checked the trees on Christmas Eve, I went out to water them again on Boxing Day.




Imagine this. Up the paddock, under the ex-Christmas tree were two delicate little deer horns!

Each about 4 – 5” long, or 10 – 15 cms in the new money, and they looked for all the world like baby reindeer horns.






Now you may think I am dreaming, but never having seen such things in our area, or even heard of anyone else finding them, what are the chances? They turned up Christmas Eve or night, under the Christmas tree and they are real deer horns.

Moral of the story? The grandchild still believes in Santa!

CHRISTMAS GRATITUDE and GOOD WISHES
So now to thank everyone who over this year past has supported the work Ruth and I offer. We meet so many extra-ordinary people, have the opportunity to interact with people on such a person, heartfelt and intimate level, we deeply appreciate the work we do.

Ruth has retired after 12 years providing a wonderful service at the Gawler Foundation and so ext year we will be working together even more.

So may the true spirit of Christmas, which is the birth of Christ - the divine embodiment of love - touch your heart deeply and fill all you love with the joy and wonder of life. May 2014 be a year of contentment, good health and meaning, and Ruth and I look forward to the possibility of meeting once again.

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NEWS

A big landmark - Ruth has retired from her position with the Gawler Foundation.


This will enable us to work more together next year - presenting retreats, some specific cancer programs and more public workshops and conference appearances.







Ruth has helped so many people during her 12 years at the Foundation. As a GP, she enabled many people to resolve health issues and stay on in the cancer programs. Ruth enjoys an excellent and well deserved reputation as a psychotherapist and she provided many people with wise counsel.

Then too, Ruth led many group sessions, taught many the art of gentle, therapeutic yoga, and of course, led many meditation sessions. I am excited by the prospect of doing more of our work together next year, some of which we will be doing in conjunction with the Foundation in the Yarra Valley.

Some of the great Gawler Foundation therapeutic team at Ruth's farewell.

Siegfried Gutbrod, Ruth, Ian, Maia and Paul Bedson

NOTICEBOARD
Meditation in the Forest : April 11 – 17, 2014
Interested in deepening your experience of meditation? Coming on retreat provides this real possibility – a breakthrough into a more direct, more profound experience.

The retreats Ruth and I present are specifically designed to provide time out from the busy pace of modern life, to rest deeply, to regenerate, to heal if necessary; but even more, to be invigorated, re-inspired and to experience something more of what meditation really has to offer – the bliss of direct experience.

The regular Pre-Easter retreat Ruth and I present is on in the Yarra Valley again in 2014 during April. For details CLICK HERE

New Year’s Eve – and the marathon vegans return to Fed Square



Consider this – Janette and Alan Wakelin will complete 365 marathons on New Year’s Eve and will be arriving in Melbourne’s Federation Square that afternoon.


Maybe if you are coming in for the evening fireworks, maybe if you are simply inspired by their extra-ordinary endurance feat, you could join us in the city and welcome them home.

Details of their efforts CLICK HERE


New Year's Eve Chanting and Meditation - 8:00 PM, 31 December 2013.
A sacred and joyful celebration of transformation and inner peace, presented by Jarek Czechowicz. Enjoy universal chant, divine music and a midnight meditation of flowing om chants. You can sing, move to the music, or just relax and soak up the healing vibrations. No drugs, no alcohol, all love.

Discover just how good you can feel!

Augustine Centre, 2 Minona St Hawthorn.
More details at www.jarekc.com/new-years-eve/ or phone 0411 639 081.
Buy tickets at www.trybooking.com/DSJL