How to avoid a mess...

Ever found your self, your life, in somewhat of a mess – and wondered how you got there? Many people seem to blame other people or external events for the mess. However, if you are reading this blog, my guess is you are at least starting to question “how much did I have to do with it?” – and what might I do to avoid future messes???

And yes, I am also guessing you know what I mean by a mess. We could be more politically correct and call it a “challenge” or an “opportunity”. We could be somewhat more blunt and call it a “problem”; but “mess” seems to have a lighter feel to it, and give the sense the situation is retrievable.

Having just attended a great retreat as a participant, there has been the opportunity to contemplate all this – and to realise the answers may be a whole lot simpler than we often first think. Simple, yet profound possibilities are open to us…

So this week, along with some detail of the rapidly approaching 8 week online Meditation and Contemplation program (starts 13th February), and details of this year’s meditation retreats and Meditation Teacher Training programs, some insights; but first

     Thought for the day

   You can search the whole world 

   For someone more worthy of your love 

   Than yourself, 

   And you will not find anyone.

   Whoever loves themselves 

   Will never harm another.

                      The Buddha

So maybe it is as simple as this… 

When something difficult comes into your life – in the form of a personal interaction, or some difficult circumstances – how do you react?

My sense is we can simplify this. Do you respond emotionally? Intellectually? Or with wisdom?

My guess is for many of us, the choice is even easier. 

We react habitually, and the “choice” we have is to react either emotionally or with wisdom - OR - intellectually or with wisdom. 

With the underlying suggestion in either case it is likely to be the former, rather than the latter. 

The reaction, the response is driven either by emotion or intellect, and wisdom is an after thought…

So consider this… When we react with emotion to difficulties, and anger is a very common response; with anger or other tricky emotions we have little chance to think clearly; we have every chance of creating a mess.

When we react with intellect, we may be thinking of what to do, how best to respond, but again, without heart of wisdom, there is still a good chance of creating a mess.

So what to do? Nothing would be a good start! With anger, we tend to jump right in, do what first occurs, and so very often create a mess. So if instead we stand back for a few moments, give the difficulties some space, allow the heat to go out of the situation; then maybe we think a little more clearly, maybe we can access our wisdom a little more directly…

That old maxim of count to ten – slowly – is not heard so much these days. My sense is it could help many people…

And what of wisdom? What we are really speaking of here is all those positive emotions and qualities. 

Like empathy, kindness, compassion, love, patience, tolerance and so on. 

And practices like understanding, forgiveness, gratitude, delight in the success of others, and so on.

These are not difficult things of themselves, just very hard to express when we are caught up in anger, guilt, shame, blame, grief and so on.

So how to move towards a more wisdom-based response? 

This of course is where meditation and contemplation come in. 

One of the first things we learn with meditation is to slow down, to be more observant of what is really going on – as opposed to what we think or project is going on – and to take time to contemplate and then act more considerately.

Meditation on its own can bring clarity and inner peace; and a perspective that does enable us to be kinder, more considerate and more capable. However, meditation goes hand in glove with contemplation. With contemplation we learn to analyse the nature of our lives, the circumstances we find ourselves to be in, and the relationships we have with other people and our environment.

When we take the time to meditate and contemplate as a regular routine, and when we remember to slow down, pause, maybe even formally meditate and contemplate before making big choices, big decisions; then there is ever chance we will avoid creating a mess, and instead create something quite beautiful.

Happy days…

 

COMING EVENTS

Bookings are now open

VENUE for all programs will be the Yarra Valley Living Centre, 55 Rayner Crt, Yarra Junction, Victoria, Australia

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-1: Meditation   12 – 16 May 2025

The core training for those new to teaching meditation, or for those seeking to deepen their skills. Five days, fully residential with an extensive manual to guide delivery of an 8 week Mindfulness-based Stillness Meditation program, or adapt to your own needs

Meditation in the Forest   Seven day meditation retreat open to all   2 – 8 June 2025

This year the focus will be on meditation – for inner peace and clarity; along with contemplation – for clear thinking, problem solving, creativity, insight, intuition and exploring the big questions in life. A great retreat; one of my very favourites!

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-3: Imagery   1 – 5 November 2025

Training in how to teach both meditation and imagery. This training explores in depth how the mind works and how we can use it more effectively. Fascinating, personally relevant and highly empowering for your communities. Also five days, fully residential with an extensive manual.

Deep Natural Peace     Long weekend mini retreat    14 – 16 November

Towards the end of the year, an ideal opportunity for some time out, some gentle introspection and reflection, letting go of the busyness and finishing the year on a meditative high.

Online Program with Ian: MEDITATION and CONTEMPLATION

Ian will present an 8 Week Online Program, Meditation and Contemplation program from 13 February to 3 April 2025 each Thursday, 7.30 – 9.00pm AEDT. 

The program has been designed to be suitable for those new to meditation and contemplation, as well as those more experienced who are looking to reconnect and dive deeper into these transformative domains.

What the Program Offers

·      Personal instruction and guided practices with Ian Gawler, live, online for 1.5 hours each Thursday for 8 weeks.

·      Email reminders each week with the Zoom link, plus key points from the previous session.

·      The opportunity to discuss and learn with other participants through regular interactive sessions.

·      Question and answer sessions with Ian Gawler each week.

·      Access to revisit the recording of each session for 3 months.

You can register via Eventbrite, using this LINK

 

 

Ruth and Ian Gawler’s Residential Programs for 2024

Speaking with friends and family, seems most of us are pretty happy 2024 is over and there is the possibility of an easier year in 2025. While there was some real adversity for me and my family, there was also the delight in 2024 of presenting meditation retreats with Ruth and Melissa Borich, and Meditation Teacher Trainings with Ruth and Murray Paterson.  The responses to this work has been so inspiring, Ruth and I are full of optimism and a renewed sense of energy after all the difficulties of 2024.

So now we are keen to present 2 meditation retreats this year, one for 7 days; the other for 3 days - along with 2 Meditation Teacher Training programs – one on meditation itself, the other where the focus will be on imagery. 

Also, Ian is presenting an 8 week online program Meditation and Contemplation starting in February – details below, along with detail of the residential programs, but first

           Thought for the day

     If you are moved by something, 

     It does not need explaining.

     
If you are not, 

    No explanation will move you.


                       Federico Fellini

The residential programs for 2025

We have changed the booking procedure for all residential programs for 2025 to make it easier for all. So if you go to our website www.iangawler.com you will find the details of the programs – summarised below. To register you first need to download an Application Form, fill it in and email it to Mel at mel@insighthealth.com.au . 

We need your details from the form, and having attended a program before, your application will be approved by our new program Manager Mel Crow. However, before paying a deposit and completing your registration, Mel will call to make personal contact and to answer any questions you may have. Of course, if you are unsure about the suitability for you of any of the programs, or have particular needs, Mel will help sort that out as well.

As you probably know, the last meditation retreat and meditation teacher training programs in 2024 were fully booked, and if you have a particular accommodation preference it will be advisable to register quite soon. 

Mel will process enquiries in order of the time the Application Forms are received, and then allocate rooms in order of when deposits are paid. 

We imagine this will be fair to all…

So, hope we can be with you again in 2025, and it is an easier year, marked by peace, good health, contentment and fulfilment...

With love

Ian and Ruth

COMING EVENTS            Bookings are now open

VENUE for all programs will be the Yarra Valley Living Centre, 55 Rayner Crt, Yarra Junction, Victoria, Australia

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-1: Meditation   12 – 16 May 2025

The core training for those new to teaching meditation, or for those seeking to deepen their skills. Five days, fully residential with an extensive manual to guide delivery of an 8 week Mindfulness-based Stillness Meditation program, or adapt to your own needs.

Meditation in the Forest   Seven day meditation retreat open to all   2 – 8 June 2025

This year the focus will be on meditation – for inner peace and clarity; along with contemplation – for clear thinking, problem solving, creativity, insight, intuition and exploring the big questions in life. A great retreat; one of my very favourites!

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-3: Imagery   1 – 5 November 2025

Training in how to teach both meditation and imagery. This training explores in depth how the mind works and how we can use it more effectively. Fascinating, personally relevant and highly empowering for your communities. Also five days, fully residential with an extensive manual.

Deep Natural Peace     Long weekend mini retreat    14 – 16 November

Towards the end of the year, an ideal opportunity for some time out, some gentle introspection and reflection, letting go of the busyness and finishing the year on a meditative high.

 

Online Program with Ian: MEDITATION and CONTEMPLATION

Ian will present an 8 Week Online Program, Meditation and Contemplation program from 13 February to 3 April 2025 each Thursday, 7.30 – 9.00pm AEDT. 

The program has been designed to be suitable for those new to meditation and contemplation, as well as those more experienced who are looking to reconnect and dive deeper into these transformative domains.

What the Program Offers

·      Personal instruction and guided practices with Ian Gawler, live, online for 1.5 hours each Thursday for 8 weeks.

·      Email reminders each week with the Zoom link, plus key points from the previous session.

·      The opportunity to discuss and learn with other participants through regular interactive sessions.

·      Question and answer sessions with Ian Gawler each week.

·      Access to revisit the recording of each session for 3 months.

You can register via Eventbrite, using this LINK

 

Fifty years out on a limb – the 7 most important lessons from being on one leg for 50 years

For many years, January the 8th for me has been a day of personal fasting. It has been one way of acknowledging that early on Wednesday, the 8th of January 1975, I was wheeled into surgery to have my right leg amputated through the hip.

Needless to say, life changed dramatically on that day. Remarkably, the anniversary this year also falls on a Wednesday. Even more remarkably, this Wednesday will be 50 years after the first. 

Curiously most of the previous anniversary's came and went relatively quietly, yet this one seems weighty and more prescient. Maybe after 50 years, maybe after all else that has happened – good, bad and indifferent - maybe this year it is possible to allow the grief to come closer to the surface. 

Of course, the day could be celebrated as the day my life was turned around for the better; the day I began to live a life with much more purpose and meaning. It is a sad fact for us human beings, that for most of us, it takes a major crisis to wake us up to what is really important in our lives, and to start to live life with that awareness. 

Certainly 50 years ago too much was lost with the amputation to allow myself to feel it. The immediate need was to find some way through what had happened; to transmute, to transcend the losses, and to attempt to reinvent this new phase of life.

But now, 50 years later, amongst other things, it is certainly possible to say valuable lessons have been learned. So for this post, the seven most important lessons learned from 50 years on one leg, but first 

       Thought for the day 

   All my life I had been looking for something, 

   And everywhere I turned 

   Someone tried to tell me what it was. 

   I accepted their answers, too, 

   Though they were often in contradiction 

   And even self-contradictory....

   I was looking for myself, 

   And asking everyone except myself 

   Questions which I, and only I, could answer.

              Ralph Ellison - The Invisible Man

1. Our state of mind is a choice - choose wisely

Ten days after the amputation came a day of profound catharsis. Amidst the pain and the grief, a vision of my future life stretched out in front of me. There were two options. One, focus on what has been lost, and be consigned to a life of misery. Two focus on what is possible, and at least have the possibility of a good life.

Maybe I was fortunate to have the clarity and strength of mind to choose to focus on the possible, but I have witnessed many others do this same thing, and in doing so, transform their own adversity and go on to have a good life… choose wisely.

2. Disability is relative - make the most of what you have 

Not many people can lay claim to being the very best at what they do. I have had the good fortune to work with and support two Olympic gold medallists. They were the very best in their chosen fields for a while, but in other fields they ranked only so-so.

In the days of being a biped, I was a passionate decathlon athlete. 

Reasonably good at ten athletic events, 

not particularly good at any one in particular. 

Relative to the Olympians, in their field, quite disabled.

With two legs I was faster than many, slower than some.

Now with one leg, I am faster than some, slower than many. 

What is there to learn?

Disability is relative - accept what you have, and what you can do. 

Disability is relative - make the most of what you have, and what you can do.

3. People will look - check your ego 

Do you sometimes get the feeling people are looking at you? Judging you? Forming opinions? Commentating? 

People quite naturally will look at the space where my leg is not. However, they usually try to do so when they think I will not notice. Children up to the age of around 5 often ask questions, adult hardly ever; although around Namchi Bazaar in high altitude Nepal while trekking, Tibetan traders would leave their yaks, come up to me and put their hand on my stump to feel what was there. That was next level! The solution? Smile and laugh…

Point is - how do you feel about yourself? And within yourself? 

Too tall, too short? Too thin, too wide? Nice body, ears too big? What is it you feel people may be staring at? If you are overly concerned with what you think other people might think about you, you are in for real problems. 

So if you do feel a need to transmute this, here is a radical, but highly effective trick. 

Get in front of a full-length mirror. Strip off… and have a look. 

If you like what you see, can smile and laugh, no problem. 

If there is some recoil, hang in there until a level of comfort is reached.

People will look - check your ego.

4. Pain is a sensation - it does not have to hurt 

There have been a lot of sensations over the years, but happily not much hurt.

So much gratitude for this is due to my first meditation teacher and mentor Dr Ainslie Meares. 

He taught me pain is made up of two things - a physical sensation, and a psychological reaction. 

The physical aspect can come to be felt as just another sensation. 

Just like we can feel hot or cold, wet or dry; pain is primarily a sensation that can be hot, sharp, dull, tight, liquid and so on. 

Just a sensation.

But then it is the psychological reaction that brings the hurt. 

The distress of thinking - what does this pain mean? 

Will it ever go away? What if it gets worse? 

Learning to differentiate the psychological reaction from the physical sensation transforms our perception of pain - pain does not have to hurt.

5. Life is precious, and fragile - make the most of it

This one comes with the risk of sounding like a cliché, yet it is true. The crisis I went through 50 years ago forced me into really appreciating how wonderful it is to be alive, and yet how fragile life is. In my decades of work with others affected by cancer, and similar life-threatening conditions, I have seen over and over how the same realisation has led to dramatic transformations in other people’s lives. 

Almost unbelievably, many people have told me how developing cancer was the best thing that ever happened to them. The best! How so? Because it helped them to realise how much they did value their life, how uncertain their future was (it always was uncertain but they ignored that; the diagnosis made this truth unavoidably clear) and how these two facts led them to do what was in their hearts… to live as if life was truly precious, and really fragile - as it is. Make the most of every moment.

6. Deep relaxation provides longevity - learn and practise it regularly 

For 50 years I have been off balance anatomically. My weight constantly rotates my lower back, and on top of this one of my lower vertebra was close to destroyed by my illness. Yet my back has been, and remains sound. I often reflect how marvellous this is - with both awe and gratitude. True, I do a lot to support my back, but the main benefits by far come from daily deep relaxation practises.

In the early days I learned to use the Progressive Muscle Relaxation exercise, then learnt to do it more quickly and more deeply. 

I cannot recommend this practice enough. 

Deep relaxation is at the heart of profound healing - of body and mind - and is a vital precursor to all meditation and contemplative practices. 

Deep Relaxation is the basis for longevity - just do it. 

7. Meditation is the greatest gift you can give yourself 

Without meditation I am not sure if I still would be here. Meditation helped me to adjust to the amputation, to endure, to transform. Then it helped me to heal again following the diagnosis of secondary cancer.

Ongoing, meditation has helped me to maintain some stability and clarity; some sense of direction and optimism through an incredibly broad and deep range of life experiences. 

These days there remains a joy in the practise of meditation. 

I enjoy the actual practise itself. 

I am profoundly grateful for the many benefits it brings into my life. 

I wonder at the privilege of having been able to write about and teach meditation for so many years. 

Amazing! 

Meditation? Again, just do it! 

And so what might the future hold? 

Who knows? Life is precious and impermanent.

Way back in February of 1976, my surgeon, whilst reviewing the way secondary cancer was devastating me, expressed the view that I would live only another two weeks. Who knows? Here I am. It has been a remarkable 2 weeks!
 

For now, it is a delight to be planning with Ruth to run more meditation retreats and Meditation Teacher Training programmes in 2025 - and beyond. Who knows? 

Life is precious and fragile - make the most of it!

The top seven would not be complete without numbers 8 and 9 

8. Maintain an attitude of gratitude

We all know how important is love, compassion, joy, equanimity and forgiveness.

Yet gratitude instantly transforms our state of mind for the better. So much to be grateful for. It is easy. From the small things, to the big ones; Maintain an attitude of gratitude.

9. Do not sweat the small stuff. It is all small stuff!

COMING EVENTS

The residential programs Ruth and I will present in 2025 are detailed below... 

BOOKINGS for these programs are now open via our website: CLICK HERE

ALSO, I am presenting an online 8 week program, Meditation and Contemplation program starting the 13th February from 7.30pm AEDT. BOOKINGS also open: CLICK HERE

We will be joined by the delightful - and highly accomplished - Melissa Borich for Meditation in the Forest and the two meditation teacher trainings...

VENUE for all residential programs will be the Yarra Valley Living Centre, 55 Rayner Crt, Yarra Junction, Victoria, Australia

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-1: Meditation   12 – 16 May 2025

The core training for those new to teaching meditation, or for those seeking to deepen their skills. Five days, fully residential with an extensive manual to guide delivery of an 8 week Mindfulness-based Stillness Meditation program, or adapt to your own needs

Meditation in the Forest   Seven day meditation retreat open to all   2 – 8 June 2025

This year the focus will be on meditation – for inner peace and clarity; along with contemplation – for clear thinking, problem solving, creativity, insight, intuition and exploring the big questions in life. A great retreat; one of my very favourites!

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-3: Imagery   1 – 5 November 2025

Training in how to teach both meditation and imagery. This training explores in depth how the mind works and how we can use it more effectively. Fascinating, personally relevant and highly empowering for your communities. Also five days, fully residential with an extensive manual.

Deep Natural Peace     Long weekend mini retreat    14 – 16 November

Towards the end of the year, an ideal opportunity for some time out, some gentle introspection and reflection, letting go of the busyness and finishing the year on a meditative high.

Meditation and Contemplation – 8 weeks online with Ian Gawler

Now here is a first… In 2025 I will present an 8 week online program featuring meditation and especially contemplation. Having taught contemplation in various residential retreats and programs over the years, and experienced it transform my life and the life of many others, it will be a delight to present this material in an easily accessible format – online. 

So this week, some insights into the breadth and depth of what contemplation has to offer, plus some detail of what the program will cover, along with good wishers for 2025, but first,

        Thought for the day

    Contemplation is a process 

   Of thinking about a particular matter 

   Over and over in a meditative fashion. 

   Contemplation has the intention 

   Of thinking that matter through clearly, 

   As well as developing creativity and insight. 

   There is also the real possibility 

   That through contemplation 

   One may access intuition 

   And come to more fully embody 

   One’s own personal truth.

                   Ian Gawler

We often hear about contemplation. People seem to revere it as a very useful tool for developing clear thinking, gaining insight, developing intuition and creativity, and even as a process that helps us to take a new concept from being an intellectual theory, into something we actually embody. However, contemplation is rarely taught and there are very few books that provide details of how to do it formally. 

In my own experience, contemplation is an essential part of the creative process. For many years now, whenever I have needed to write something significant, I have used contemplation to think the matter through sequentially, and then to open the door to insight and intuition – and the full creative process.

I love the practice of contemplation. 

It is one of my very favourite things to teach. 

Another reason for this is contemplation bridges the Active Mind - which with all its thoughts and emotions is the domain of the intellect, and the Still Mind which is beyond all that activity and is the domain of wisdom.

During the 8 weeks of the program we will meditate together each session, and I will share some meditation practice tips and deepen the theory that supports the practice. 

However, the main content will focus upon contemplation - its techniques, theory and practice. The program has been designed for those new to all this, as well as the more experienced. It will be highly experiential and interactive, with time for questions and answers… Plus we will email you summaries of the key points from each week, and you will be able to access recordings of each session for up to 3 months so you can go over the content or revisit the many guided practices.

Meditation and Contemplation – 8 weeks online with Ian Gawler

Every Thursday from February the 13th at 7.30 to 9.00pm AEDT (check your time zone).

Bookings: CLICK HERE

And as a bonus, here are some more definitions, along with how contemplation is regarded in different traditions – enjoy…

CONTEMPLATION 

General definition - from the Oxford Dictionary

Contemplation: The act of thinking about or pondering over a thing continuously, musing, meditation.

The action of viewing as a possibility or as a purpose; taking into account, prospect, intention.

Contemplate: be occupied in contemplation, ponder, view mentally, consider in a particular aspect.

Look at with continuous attention, observe thoughtfully, regard as possible, expect, take into account as a contingency. 

Have in view as a purpose, intend.

The author, Ian Gawler’s working definition:


Contemplation is a process of thinking about a particular matter over and over in a meditative fashion. Contemplation has the intention of thinking that matter through clearly, as well as developing creativity and insight. There is also the real possibility that through contemplation one may access intuition and come to more fully embody one’s own personal truth.

Contemplation in Greek Philosophy

Contemplation was integral to Plato’s philosophy. Plato stated that through contemplation, the soul may ascend to knowledge of the Form of the Good, or other divine Forms. Here, Forms are defined as perfect, eternal, and changeless concepts existing outside space and time; the Form of the Good is the mysterious highest Form and the source of all the other Forms.

Contemplation in a religious context

The practice of contemplation seeks a direct awareness of the divine which transcends the intellect, often in accordance with religious practices such as meditation or prayer. Some examples: 

Christianity

The anonymous 14th Century text, Cloud of Unknowing makes clear that the practice of contemplation is not an act of the intellect, but a kind of transcendent 'seeing,' beyond the usual activities of the mind.

In Catholicism, St. Thomas Aquinas wrote: "It is requisite for the good of the human community that there should be persons who devote themselves to the life of contemplation." One of his disciples, Josef Pieper commented: "For it is contemplation which preserves in the midst of human society the truth which is at one and the same time useless and the yardstick of every possible use; so it is also contemplation which keeps the true end in sight, gives meaning to every practical act of life."

In Eastern Christianity, contemplation literally means to see God or to have the Vision of God.

Judaism

Contemplation has been a central part of Jewish tradition throughout history, and is a focus of the growing Contemplative Judaism movement - a new, more universalist theology that sees God as a force/consciousness/Presence known through experience, and recognized through a wide range of practices including traditional liturgy and commandments, but also through meditation, experience in nature, and art.

In Judaism, contemplative practices include silence, quieting the mind, concentration, and cultivating ethical and spiritual qualities. 

Islam

It is said Muhammad would go into the desert, climb a mountain known as Mount Hira, and seclude himself from the world. While on the mountain, he would contemplate life and its meaning.

Bahai

Baha’u’llah and Abdu’l-Baha wrote about contemplation and meditation in regard to reflecting on beauty, the Kingdom of God, science, and the arts. Abdu'l-Baha stated that "the sign of the intellect is contemplation, and the sign of contemplation is silence... he cannot both speak and meditate".

 

 

Three Month Solitary, Silent Retreat – Part 3: The Outcomes

Setting off on three months of silent, solitary retreat, it felt like it would be nice to have something to show for it all when I returned. So I decided from Day 1 not to shave. This may not sound like much to many, however, there was an element of courage involved. Being far from the hairiest person around, there was no guarantee there actually would be anything to show…

In the event, very little did grow on the sides of my face, but happily, a goatee did appear… 

This was fun to parade around for a month or so, but then the higher powers requested it come off, so that outcome was short lived.

So what else is there to say in terms of outcomes from the retreat? 

In this, the third post – after Preparation and Process – some details, but first

   Thought for the day

        The self is not a thing

       The self is a process

                     Ian Gawler

Again the need to reiterate… many traditions and meditation teachers recommend against sharing our personal experiences during meditation, or their outcomes. This is on account of the risks involved. One might simply feed the ego, be distracted by talking about meditation rather than doing it, become consumed by jealousy of the experiences of others, come to feel something of a failure, or go on a high-flying ego trip. Many potential problems.

On the other hand, shared experiences can be both informative and inspiring. So for anyone considering sharing, there is a need to check the ego and the tendency to indulge in destructive emotions. This means sharing experiences has in itself the potential to be a step along the path, and another step towards breaking down the ego… or a step backwards, depending upon how one does it…

So… some outcomes:

1. The Study

I read several books and went over some important previous retreat notes. 

In order of reading, Sogyal Rinpoche’s books The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying (widely available) and Padmasambhava and Dzogchen (out of print but maybe on a 2nd hand site), provided a useful reminder of the “theory” that supports Dzogchen meditation practice. 

Then Andy Karr’s Contemplating Reality provided a very useful sequence of contemplations in the latter half of the retreat when I did contemplate more directly on the true nature of self and things.

Having attended a powerful retreat in France back in 2015, I took this opportunity to go over the notes taken in detail; to really study them, to fill in the gaps and do what I could to embody them more.

2. The Meditation Practice

Sitting in formal meditation became steadily more enjoyable throughout the retreat. I welcomed the sessions more and more, and a natural ease did come into the practice.

Happily, my body responded surprisingly well to sitting a lot. In fact, the more I sat, the more solid the posture became, and the more ease there was with it all.

Also, as the days passed, the outer distractions steadily fell away, and the awareness became more heightened. 

Colours did actually seem more vivid, the eyesight sharper, sounds clearer; sensations generally became more acute.

With less external distractions, and less internal distractions generally, those that were left became stronger. 

So what one might label pleasant seemed very pleasant; anything that was troublesome tended to also become amplified. 

Happily, with the heightened awareness, rather than becoming drawn into these extremes, there was a heightened capacity to simply notice they were extremes, to be aware, to allow them to come and go, and to remain relatively undistracted.

What was emerging was a stronger connection with the View. 

Our view is how we interpret the world; what sense we make of it, what our philosophical understandings are, what meaning we give to self and life. This view can be informed by our Active Mind with all its myriad and diverse thoughts and emotions – as is commonly the case. Or it can be informed by our Still Mind, or the true nature of our mind with all its clarity and wisdom. 

So as the meditation continued, supported by reading and contemplation, The View, with a capital V to signify being informed by the Still Mind, came more to the fore. And with this View, an ever-increasing surety thoughts and emotions are so often little more than mental gossip. They come and go, they are fleeting. With the View it is as if we can see through our thoughts and emotions; see their potential for good or harm, and not take them so seriously, not be disturbed or distracted by them. 

Having said this, there were plenty of times where the awareness lapsed, and the mind wandered off into some story or another, some fantasy, or just dissolved into some relatively lifeless limbo for a while.

But then, more and more the awareness that each moment is different; unique, precious and fascinating. No possibility of ever becoming bored; not with this ever-changing present moment experience…

3. The Contemplation Practice

During the second half of the retreat, the focus shifted from meditation to contemplation. Still lots of straight sitting, but more active contemplation – on the attachment to self, and the nature of reality. 

In an attempt to explain some of this, let us begin with attachment to self. 

What is meant here is the way we identify so strongly with self – my body, my mind, my house, my family and so on… 

With this strong sense of self, comes an equally strong sense of other – your body, your mind, your house, your family and so on… 

With this duality – self and others – comes all the opposites – mine and yours, attachment (this is mine, I want to keep it) and aversion (I do not like this, I want to avoid it), pleasure (I want more of that) and pain (I want none of that), joy (I got what I wanted) and sorrow (I missed out on, or lost what I wanted) and so on.

The stronger the attachment to self, the more we over-identify with this sense of me and my ego. 

The more the duality, the more the sense of isolation between me and others will be felt, and along with that, more anxiety, more fear, discomfort, distress, and real suffering.

And on a deeper level, simply contemplating “Who am I?” reveals that this self is a very slippery customer. We have such a strong sense of it, we feel we are definitely me, but if we turn within, and go looking for where is this thing called me located, or what is it made of; it is very hard to find.

So if we do go looking, what might we find? 

Could spend a good deal of time on this, but to keep it simple… The dualistic mind sees the world through three mistaken lenses. 

Firstly, it likes to think of things as permanent. I have a permanent job, a permanent home, a permanent relationship and so on. We know in our hearts all these things will change over time, however, instead of living informed by the truth of change, the ego, the attachment to self, clings onto the lie of permanence and does all it can to support this lie – and to defend it.

Secondly, the dualistic mind likes the lie we are independent. 

This does seem to be so on face value. 

I am in my body over here, you are in your body over there. True. 

However, we are in reality completely inter-dependent – both upon each other, and upon everything around us. 

We cannot possibly exist in a vacuum. 

We are dependent upon each other for food, for work, for company, and so on.

Thirdly, the dualistic mind tends to think of things as singular – as in one thing rather than everything having multiple facets. So we talk of my body – one thing. However, it is many things – hands, feet, skin, intestines, muscle, nerves and so on. We know this of course, but we tend to characterise most things in this way. “She is a good person”. “He is a ratbag”. Maybe the generalisations have some element of truth to them, but if we do not go beyond them, we limit our appreciation of people and things.

So in the contemplation, the aim was to investigate the self’s claim to a true identity; and to make some sense of what it means to actually not have a self that is a finite thing – an enduring, long-lasting, permanent thing.

And the realisation? Like the quote above…

The self is not a thing

The self is a process.

4. The Hangover

Post retreat, I find myself pleasantly drawn to meditate first thing each morning – and actually doing it. This is a new development; along with a heightened joy in the actual practice. Clearly the two go together; more enjoyable, more enthusiasm to practice.

The consequences of the contemplations continue to mature… maybe more on that another time.

5. The Conclusion

A big thank you to all who made it possible for me to indulge in this retreat. Ruth in particular, was unequivocally supportive, and incidentally, as it happened, she reports having gained a good deal from those 3 months on her own. 

To make the time, to clear the space to allow for a 3 month retreat, obviously involves some planning, determination and commitment. Worth it? Absolutely? Recommend it to others? Only if you have a strong motivation, and even stronger volition…

COMING EVENTS

The residential programs Ruth and I will present in 2025 are now set. We will be joined by the delightful - and highly accomplished - Melissa Borich for Meditation in the Forest and the two meditation teacher trainings...

Bookings will open early in January. We will advise when they commence, but for now, maybe make a note of the dates:

VENUE for all programs will be the Yarra Valley Living Centre, 55 Rayner Crt, Yarra Junction, Victoria, Australia

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-1: Meditation   12 – 16 May 2025

The core training for those new to teaching meditation, or for those seeking to deepen their skills. Five days, fully residential with an extensive manual to guide delivery of an 8 week Mindfulness-based Stillness Meditation program, or adapt to your own needs

Meditation in the Forest   Seven day meditation retreat open to all   2 – 8 June 2025

This year the focus will be on meditation – for inner peace and clarity; along with contemplation – for clear thinking, problem solving, creativity, insight, intuition and exploring the big questions in life. A great retreat; one of my very favourites!

Meditation Teacher Training – MTT-3: Imagery   1 – 5 November 2025

Training in how to teach both meditation and imagery. This training explores in depth how the mind works and how we can use it more effectively. Fascinating, personally relevant and highly empowering for your communities. Also five days, fully residential with an extensive manual.

Deep Natural Peace     Long weekend mini retreat    14 – 16 November

Towards the end of the year, an ideal opportunity for some time out, some gentle introspection and reflection, letting go of the busyness and finishing the year on a meditative high.

LINKS

Three Month Solitary, Silent Retreat – Part 1: The Preparation

Three Month Solitary, Silent Retreat – Part 2: The Process